6.17.2010

keyboard confessions: volume 1

Keyboard Confessions is not my idea, but I'm going to use it anyway, because I think the best way to compliment someone is by stealing their idea. Or just borrowing it and giving them a shout-out and some credit. You may also find awesome Keyboard Confessions from Kearsie of Sounds Like Tomatoes and from Amber of What The French, Toast.

I like lists and I am very random, so this is right up my alley. Let's begin.

1. No matter what the situation or who I am with, I will say "that's what she said" after an applicable sentence. Example: Friend: "It was stuck. I kept tugging and pulling, but it wouldn't come out". Me: "That's what she said!" zing.

2. I know that I have the same sense of humor as a swearing 5 year old. Sorry. No, wait, I'm not sorry. I'm only sorry that you don't find poop, pee and fart jokes worth a laugh.

3. I pick my nose using my thumb. I pinch the outside of my nostril, thumb in nose and pointer finger on the outside of nose. That's my technique.

4. Funny how I won't let my almost 4 year old pick his nose though. It's probably to get back at him for not letting me pick his fingernails. Don't ask.

5. Every time I get a manicure the lady makes fun of me. I guess I have really small fingernails. She always asks "where you want me to paint? you nails so leeeeetle". I get it, that means you make just as much for doing LESS work. Paint them and keep quiet.

6. I've finally conquered my orphan sock phobia. I have a cute basket I keep them in, and I don't just let them sit there. I match them to their long lost mates every once in awhile. And I don't gag when I touch them anymore, well, unless they're covered in dog hair from hiding under the bed.

7. Even though we re-homed our dog Maddie to my best friend and her family in Eugene about a month or so ago, I still come home and look for her sometimes. Taylor has to remind me she's no longer here. I wonder what will happen when my kids go away to college.

8. My son is watching a Strawberry Shortcake DVD from the library. I wonder about him sometimes, but at least he's taking a break from Fresh Beat Band.

9. I'm becoming an earring lover. And not just my normal diamond earring studs. I am liking dangle earrings! And I just bought some amazing ones from Jenny Bunny, and I can't wait to see them in my ears. Also found some fun ones at Target the other day. I can't stop thinking about decorating my ears.

10. I told my husband last night that he can choose our new car and I don't want to even think about it or make any decisions. I question myself sometimes.

11. Soon I'll get my nose pierced. I wonder if it'll make me look like I'm trying to be younger. It's not like I'm wearing a Hello Kitty shirt at the same time, so I think I'll be okay.

12. If I squish my stomach together I can make it look like a dimply baby butt. I can't wait to get my body back. And I bet Hubs would like me to stop showing him my stomach trick. I'm guessing it's not as sexy as I was hoping it would be.

13. How long am I supposed to do this list? Like what number do I go until?

14. All I ever wanna wear is jeans and a fun t-shirt and flips. I wasn't meant to dress up. I just wasn't. I think I'm fine with this now.

15. I'm done until next week. I'll miss you. See you tomorrow for Factual Friday!

smooches,
Shauna

7 comments:

Kearsie said...

Oh my gosh, you have to stop being so awesome or I'll totally have a girly crush on you. Seriously. Stop it. Write something to make me not like you so I can find some balance.

*tucking one more thing in my Shauna envelope*

Shauna said...

I once kicked a puppy? not true, but maybe that'll help you from falling madly in love with me. also, I fart under the covers and in the car, and when it's in the car, I lock the windows so Trask can't get fresh air.

Kearsie said...

Sometimes, I poot and then look at my shoes to act like that strange noise came from my Yellow Box.

Much More Than Mommy said...

I like how you gave Kearsie and Amber the shout outs, because you know that FRIENDS GIVE FRIENDS A HAND (a real helping hand).

Amber said...

Shauna! I love that you're confessing now. Yippee! Ok, you and I are also very much alike cause a)I use the same nose picking technique b)I love bodily fluid jokes c)I love earrings too and it was a new phenom in my life about a year ago or so d) i want to get my nose pierced too e)I love tshirts and jeans!!!

You rock and maybe I should start my own shauna envelope!

Amber said...

oh... and I totally fart in the car. We have contests when we take week long road trips (be on the look out for the results of the upcoming Yellostone edition)... and I usually win!

Jill said...

I totally used to pick my nose the same way as a kid! Now I use the index finger, it just feels right.

I'm not allowed to fart around Wade, so if it happens, he'd rather I pretend it didn't instead of saying "Excuse me". I love your confessions!